Double Entendre – double entendre

so good I said it twice by Pretty Polly

Every now and then regular readers will know that when it comes to double entendres we like to slip one in every now and then.

Recently the urge to splash out on some new bedroom furniture came over us and following the relentless but eventual successful search for beds we now look to check out additional bedroom essentials – a chest of drawers.

Once committed to the hunt for a good set of drawers you’ll soon  discover a world of bedroom furniture, including beds, drawers, wardrobes, chests and bedroom sets that will thrill and excite you

Chest of Drawers

After a bed a chest of drawers is one of the most practical pieces of furniture that you can buy and a wonderful turn of phrase for fans of double entendres.

You can use a chest of drawers for storing clothes, jewellery and many other items, so that your bedroom looks clutter-free, and you can also place items such as ornaments, a mirror or a television on the top.

Remember drawers are a fantastic double entendre opportunity – the word “drawers” is often used to refer to knickers and other lingerie items. Telling people you’ve been rummaging around in your drawers will bring a wry smile to most sauce spotters. Further exploration of the association of undies and your drawers will gain much attention and if followed by a classic double entendre joke (I asked the barman for a double entendre) will have your audience in fits of laughter (so he gave me one)

Choosing a Chest of Drawers – Chest Size

The first thing to think about is the size of chest of drawers that you want. You will need to work out where you want to place it and measure up.

It’s important to take some time to think about where you want to put your new drawers. If it’s wood, for example, you should place it out of direct sunlight in order to stop it from fading, and you should also make sure that it isn’t next to a direct heat source, such as a radiator.

Make sure that you leave enough space around your chest of drawers for you to be able to move around your bedroom without having to squeeze by it and, if you are intending to place it near to any beds or your bedroom door, make sure that there will be enough space for you to open and close the door properly.

One of the most important things to do when measuring up for a new chest of drawers is to ensure that you leave enough space for the drawers to be opened fully.

Style and Quality

When choosing a new chest of drawers, make sure that you buy one that is practical. Think about how many drawers you want and how deep or wide they need to be. It’s easy to underestimate how much room you are likely to need, and it’s better to have some free space in your drawers than to find that you can’t fit everything in.

If you want to store underwear and lingerie or other items of clothing in your chest of drawers, you will probably find that you are using it every day, so choose something sturdy, so that it will stand the test of time.

Make sure that you choose a high-quality chest of drawers. The drawers should open smoothly and be constructed using dovetail joints. The drawer handles should be fixed securely in order to be able to stand up to regular heaving and hoing.

You should also make sure that your new chest of drawers will fit in with the style of your bedroom and either match or contrast effectively with your bed and bedding as well as the rest of the furniture in the room. If you are considering replacing the rest of the furniture in your bedroom, you may want to consider buying a bedroom set. Bedroom sets usually consist of several pieces of matching furniture combining beds a chest of drawers and a wardrobe, or a chest of drawers and a bedside table.

We’ve enjoyed picking out a few easy double entendres in this otherwise dull but informative article about choosing furniture. Remember drawers can go down as well as up.

Double Entendre Fest – The Two Ronnies – Wordsmith Masters

As a special treat here’s a superb example of the Two Ronnies at their double-entendre-tastic.